Art Archives: February-June 2017

in this blog article, i share my personal creative work since SOUL SEED GATHERING in Guatemala this past February 2017, and through early June 2017.

so, Soul Seed Gathering was dope. Guatemala. 
Mayan juju. 
elders. 
so much learning.  

also, i gave my first live performance involving nudity. 

i am currently in the midst of an on-going performance art project, called, new/mind/ritualz, and this particular performance for an all-woman audience in Guatemala allowed me to see + feel how i can expand upon + offer fuller movements of this project in the future. nudity will sometimes come into play: this detail is being deeply evaluated and decided upon ... though what will always come into play for my personal expressions is the use of my body and iconography to storytell through the lens of (and loyalty to) experimental artistry.

* * * archives for new/mind/ritualz ~ HERE

 
 and 

listening 2 Mayan elder women, foto: Hana Wolf

waist beading workshop, foto: Hana Wolf

pre-performance self-portrait

performance still, foto: Hana Wolf

post-performance, foto: Chloe Rae

with SACRED LIBERATION

headed down, headed home.
foto: Roz

the video of my performance is currently private; i am in the process of determining how to present it ~ note: 12.30.2018.


before my performance @ SSG, i gave an informal talk about the movement known as FUTURE FEMINISM. this movement was founded by Sierra and Bianca Casady, the sisters of CocoRosie, in conjunction with Kembra Pfahler, Anohni, and Johanna Constantine. i am no expert or spokesperson (obvi) for the movement, but i have followed it, because each artist who is a part of it has gained my liking for their own bodies of work, and the levels @ which they thrive creatively. #inspirational. i will not in this blog article discuss @ depth the work of these artists or FUTURE FEMINISM ~ be coaxed to do so on your own if it pleases you.

: here is a reference to get you started :

HUFFPOST 2014

CocoRosie, for/by: Revista

Kembra as Karen Black, photo: Walter Wlodarczyk

below are some of the Future Feminism tenets, etched upon rose quartz, which is the primary stone (crystal prowess) indicative of women's womb wisdom and heart*softening as an action, a practice ~ no doubt an intentional choice on behalf of the artists.

THE FUTURE IS FEMALE

RELIEVE MEN OF THEIR ROLES AS PROTECTORS AND PREDATORS

THE SUBJUGATION OF WOMEN AND THE EARTH IS 
ONE AND THE SAME

REPATTERN SOCIETIES TO NURTURE THE 
RESURGENCE OF BIODIVERSITY

and III ~ ENFORCE A GLOBAL STANDARD FOR THE RIGHTS AND ETHICAL TREATMENT OF WOMEN.

each of these tenets was read to my audience pre-performance as points of reference and influence. 

at SSG, i also spoke to a term (pre-performance) and in my waist beading workshops called, AVAILABISM, which was created, is taught, and is practiced by Kembra Pfahler. in my own words, AVAILABISM means using what you have access to, what is available. for me, using beaches, jungle, and my upstairs balcony to make art makes sense ~ it's where i am, and doesn't require a purchase. using seashells, driftwood, and glitter i pull out of my make-up bag vs. buying new stuff in town (sometimes i literally don't have the budget) are all examples of Availabism. buying kiddo's toys @ the corner store that make noises for recording music is also so fun vs. buying high-tech equipment ~ don't get me wrong, both are great. :P 

... when i lead a workshop, i often bring my own mixed-up baggies of beads ~ the leftovers. if you look deeply enough, you will find pretty stones within ~ this is what i have available in the moment, and we enjoy and give thanks for it, the little hidden treasures. Availabism can also be practiced with the body. how can i express through my body and with my body (movements or emotions) without fancy props and lighting, you know? what *is* available? a tree? a chair? the sunset? another person? work with it. be present with it. create in the moment ~ Availabism encourages all of this!!

... about Kembra's Availabism: "In her art and music, Pfahler follows the philosophy of availabism— making the best of what’s available. This is apparent in the low tech props and homemade costumes the Girls of Karen Black don on stage and which fill Pfahler’s exhibition installations." Kembra's Availabism also "dispels the antiquated notion that there is a hierarchy of artistic mediums."

* * * 

RECLAMATION is also a theme i spoke to @ SSG; i will continue to speak to it throughout my career. here's what i know for now:

in these last 2-3 years of living on Costa Rica's Caribbean Coast, there has been a strong interpersonal pull reignited, given new depth. in large part, the lush and strong presence of this land, its environmental+energetic (natural) tendency to shake shit up, spit a girl out, and ask her to stand more strongly, has everything to do with everything.

this pull i speak to is a rededication 

(an ongoing dedication) 

to RECLAMATION,

which looks like:

* i am in a self-loving relationship with me and me; i reclaim this relationship as my priority.

* i reclaim my right to self-heal, to be the sweetest bruja and mother to myself.

* there is nothing wrong with me. (repeat often.) i reclaim & treasure my humanness. 

* i enact my right to be treated well by others. 

* i reclaim my right to understand and choose healthy relationships with fellow humans; these bonds are rich, trustworthy, and lasting/sustainable.

* i reclaim my right to an inner-circle and an abundance of solitude. intimacy is gorgeous medicine sometimes ~ so is my intentionally orchestrated alone-time.

* i reclaim my ancestor's wisdom by coming back to the Earth and living more simply, quietly. however, i choose to release their non-wisdom, therefore busting up intergenerational trauma; i am a pattern-breaker.

* i acknowledge my sexual awakening. i reclaim my body as my own. i share it loyally in a special loving relationship if i want. i share it in the name of art. i share it firstly with myself.

* i am defining my personal feminism. i reclaim my right to invent my own way.

* i dismantle patriarchal conditioning, shame. by reclaiming my personal power and growing my voice, i encourage the collective, namely fellow women, to do so too; this is work from the inside out, an ongoing practice.

* i claim my right (my consent) to be seen and experienced as an artist ~ in what forms and places + how. you choose to view or not view said work ~ my intention is not one of imposition.

* i embody and deny no part of my descent ~ the exploration of all shadows, wisely as is possible. in this way, i do not hesitate to speak about my sadness and rage, which is real, but not constant. i therefore reclaim my right to be whole, not just shiny and performative to please or peace-keep.

* i am ultimately RISEN into my divine feminine awakening ~ on my own terms and in my own time. i accept that i may waiver. when i waiver, i cover myself in honey and/or reach for support from a trusted woman. ((i reclaim my right to bathe often in honey-rivers and pastel-oceans.))

* i speak up about my experiences ~ not all are cute. i reclaim my right to speak to the whole of my experiences without approval; i trust myself. 

* i speak to the injustice i see in the world, not as a graceful expert, but as a delicate human. i protect marginalized peoples & promote equality within all cultures.

* i continue to exercise forgiveness of myself and others; this practice is on-going. i acknowledge my ability to make better choices now vs. then.

* lastly, a bitch reclaims her JOY!! i live in JOY as often as is possible. in living joyfully, my inner-child is incredibly active, i create stability for myself, **&** i self-care voraciously; it's an unapologetic priority. 

 * * *

i also want to speak to you about nudity in my work, which is a delicate topic for me right now, actually ... a topic that has delayed my publication of this particular blog article. sometimes i do not feel called to be nude in my work, and sometimes i honor that i do. of course, i have people who have asked me not to be nude (my mom, an ex) ... but every woman performance artist i admire has done so in her career. 

my sometimes-concern is that my expressions will be viewed as sinful, pornographic, or attention-seeking, particularly in a country whose traditional leanings are Catholic and conservative. this location-based fact aside, what i'm invested in personally is pushing myself to be artful in ways that challenge my personal comfort in moments ~ i learn so much in doing so. i also feel that being nude is literally ... and spiritually, my most vulnerable presentation of self.

i'm actually highly empathic and introverted, so getting naked for people isn't cute or easy necessarily, but it challenges me to step into my "BO$$-self." another side of me loves to twerk, wants to learn pole fitness, and has crushes on rappers. u know? #allOFme :P

additionally, i follow quite seamlessly the voices that Spirit passes through my ears. when i made my first nude works in Maine years ago, i was doing just this: obeying Spirit's nudge to explore nudity ~ what does the making of nude work teach me about myself, personal trauma, collective trauma, and self-healing as an art form?

lastly, i could write a book about how porn, dating apps, and tourism are destroying true love, but i'd rather make art about it. how can i ask, train, or coax an audience to view my body as a sacred object for art? how, in turn, do i combat the inevitable sexualization that comes with my experiments? in moments, i am choosing to be sexy and celebratory, of course, but always on my own terms, and with my own set of boundaries in place.

this is a topic that i will continue to touch upon ~ i've hardly broken the ice here. 

* * *
and now, i will approach the remainder of this article with primarily images and a little bit of video from recent performances. 

SIREN'S is an annual event that occurs in Puerto Viejo, Costa Rica, and i contributed some of my performance art rituals atop the music of Margot Day.

foto: Michael Preston 

foto: Michael Preston 

foto: Michael Preston 

foto: Manuel Pinto

... and back in Brooklyn several months ago, i gave a performance (another experiment in-line with my on-going project, new/mind/ritualz) for an intimate group of supporters @ GAMBA.

Statia & kelly in Brooklyn

kelly + Basquiat

post-performance foto: Statia

post-performance foto: Steve Narvaez

post-performance foto: Statia

post-performance with Chris Carr

a very very special thanks to new friend and fellow artist, Steve Narvaez, for creating these videos, xxoxxxxo!!

for now, 

kelly shaw willman

original writings by ksw: copyright 2017-forever.

dear Facebook,

i'm breaking up with you.

you know, cutie-reader, Facebook has always been a weird playground (forum) for me. Twitter is much more light-hearted, pinterest is just fun, and my blog is my baby, but Facebook stresses me out.

peep$ i love have suggested methods for "better navigating" Facebook ~ 

one friend rarely browses through her newsfeed, cuz it takes up too much of her time, energy, and sensitivities. instead, she goes directly to her page and shares pertinent material for her viewers. 

another friend sets the intention before signing in to see only that which she needs to see, and i imagine her preference is for kind words, funny pics ~ pleasant things, u know?

yet others are accessible or signed-in practically all the time; it's become the most common way we "communicate." i myself much prefer sit-down's with tea and eyeball-contact, at least, when i'm not all-consumed by my introversion. :P

and i may not be great at it with certain folks, but let's talk about communication. it's an art. it can take time to develop, train. it can also come with great ease in certain environments, and with certain dear pals.

also, i *love* the concept of the internet and social media being used for good. 

good communications. good sharing. real sharing.

we have the chance to be so very connected, to talk about the beautiful *AND* ouchy stuff happening in the world, to share our stories, our art, to uplift each other ...

it's just that i personally want to re-route how i use my time for a few focused weeks, and in general.

~ ~ ~ 

i deleted my first-ever account about 5-6 years ago (at a point when i was experiencing a major life-change, which is the case now also) ... and i've also unfriended and unfollowed people with my newer account (not without guilt, but i'm working on that) who are doing sketchy things in the real-world or to my friends. i struggle with this ~ people representing themselves online like everything is peachy, but then being rude out and about. 

one face in public, and jerks online. no puedo ~

i want something more genuine and cohesive. 

for me, it's about quality of communications vs. keeping up for the sake of keeping up. 

also, i do not have FOMO. on the contrary, when i envision myself deleting my current accounts, i feel ssssoooooo relieved. 

am i attached to all the albums and posts i've made? people like it. say they're cute or cool, but the answer is no. the material i am connected to lives on my blog or is backed-up. mami good.

besito,

kelly *

p.s. Facebook has also been a bitch (and not the badass kind) about me posting my work sometimes. my links have been reported before, and were not fixed for months. so, part of my departure is in an effort to support other forums that allow my wholeness, my whole creative vision. meow.

p.p.s. may i also admit that this choice is about self-care? completely.

self-designed art grant

i have self-designed an art grant thru gofundme. 

read on, dear strawberry ~ ~ ~ 

love,

kelly shaw willman, artista *

https://www.gofundme.com/artedekellyshaw

foto de la artista by Statia Grossman,
copyright 2 thee artists alway$

jungle-sentiment

today, i took a look @ myself in a darkened glass doorway in town, which reflected my shape unto me, know what i mean? i didn't have access 2 a full-length mirror as i was getting ready, but i felt really good, so i left the house & bused on in. 

... my thighs, hips, booty, & arms are big; i am big. 

MACHOTA.

... my wrists, hands, feet, & teeth are small; 

my proportions r fascinating.

i see so many ancestors in me.

i am a fierce fucking panther.
u r too.
don't forget, porfa.

GUATEMALA $$$

dear friend ~

in a focused 2-week gofundme campaign, i am rallying for $420 towards my trip to Guatemala at the end of the month. check out this link for all the juicy details!!

love,

kelly *

https://www.gofundme.com/kellyshawwillman

foto: Statia Photography

note : : : january 23, 2017 (checking back in) : : : 

the outpouring of donations to my gofundme campaign mean more than words can touch ~ it's all really timely and sweet to me, b/c the world needs art and friendship and support now more than ever. 

... and my asking has been answered with such kindness.

i will also share my budget (general) soon.style="text-align: left;">

UPDATE : : : APRIL 26, 2017 : : :

it always takes longer to get crowdfunding updates and prizes out than i think it will so, i thank u incredibly for your patience. all prizes, if not yet delivered locally in-person, will go out within the first week in May. i'm done with all your goodies, just needing to package and address. 

... and here is the very simplified version of how $ was used, which i committed to sharing with you. i raised $657 of $420. gofundme took 8%, or about $53. with the remaining $604 i used ~ 

$220 on lodging

$130 on transportation

$180 on art supplies

$100+ on food 

$50 on miscellaneous ~ which included a few toiletries, drops for an eye infection, and airport taxes. 

... this total comes to $680+. i used some funds that came "under the table" vs. through gofundme's link, for extra costs.

thank u so ~ 

kelly shaw willman *

embelli$hed

i've called these recent images, 

"alien-embelli$ments // vi$ion-boarding." 

love, la artista ~

kelly shaw willman *

original foto: Statia Grossman

original foto: Krista Abramoff

original foto: Carlos Ramirez

original foto: Krista Abramoff

original foto: Statia Grossman

original foto: Krista Abramoff

original foto: Jesse Artavia

original foto: Statia Grossman

original foto: Krista Abramoff

orig foto: Statia Grossman

a few thingz

i just wanted to share a few thingz that are completed and/or upcoming in my creative life.

... my blog serves as an archive of experiences and art-centered expressions, so i am simply "keeping note" if you will, by publishing this brief article. #archives

recently, ART BOREAL 4 GANDHI released a dope music video. i had the pleasure of being on set in Heredia, Costa Rica, the 1st day of shooting, and am stoked to support this gorg song which contains important messages of uplift and hope. what high vibes and rad team work ~ really a cool time!! #honored ... you will see me in the vid for a few moments @ the beginning. 

BOREAL'S BEHANCE

i am super-excited 2 have been selected as a scholarship recipient to the first SOUL SEED GATHERING in Guatemala. feeling stoked to share space with fellow brujas, but above all, honestly, am elated to give a performance that marks my first fully nude public work as part of my ongoing project, new/mind/ritualz, which you can read about HERE. i have been provided a few opportunities lately in which *safe space* is made to express my raw and unconventional creative interests. thank u, sisterz, 4 nourishing my bravery. 

also very honored to be a scholarship recipient to a dope biz seminar (a first of its kind) lead by Adi Shakti of PASSION YOGA SCHOOL.

life is shifting incredibly. 
the jungle is nuts. 
i continue to learn (beyond wordz.)

xoxxxxxxx,

kelly shaw willman, artista *

everything ... practically.

please note that this article contains nudity. please also note that this article is long-winded. please lastly note that this article became a sorta manifesta written by me to me. if there are angles that prove helpful to you, too cool. (basically, i pep talked myself back into being me.) 

~ xoxxx, la artista, kelly shaw willman ~

foto: Statia Grossman

"$elf-portz" #14 *feelings*

it's sorta funny. i set out to write these epic, organized blog articles sometimes, but really, it's that this one wants to be an exercise in flow ~ in sharing a diary-like, inner-world-on-display-sorta-reflection that honestly speaks to what i've been experiencing these last few months. ... and i've decided to approach it by trusting that all the things i've been observing + considering will find their way out, cuz abiding by bullet-note prompts doesn't feel like the thing right now.

so, here i go ... about ... everything, practically *

1. i've been thinking a lot about a time in the past (Maine, United States, 2012-ish) in which i was first coaxed by Spirit to make nude performance art. for me, *coaxed by Spirit* means that a force and feeling (greater than me) asked that i channel healing though expression, that i fuse (conceptually) sweetness with dirt. 

i do not believe this remembering is an accident. on the contrary, it's incredibly timely and filled with symbolism, a message. as a being who lives a spiritual, eclectic (artist's) life, signs/dreams/words unspoken all guide me as i need to be guided ~ i believe in this sorta thing, have experienced it since childhood, and am incessantly deepening my connection to an understanding of it all ~ visions and intuition playing a foundational part. reviewing images of this (first-time) nude art reminds me that i, in spite of having a considerably introverted and highly empathic personality, put it all out there (in my own way) when it comes to my artistry. 

"grunge*quest" ~ movement 1 (foto: Janna Zagari)

i decided a long time ago that my own personal journey would be on display through the medium of performance art ~ that my stories, my progress, my setbacks, my ritualizing, my changeable aura ... would be made a public offering intended to bring an experience to viewers, evoking conversations that i participate in by making more art, and honoring along the way aesthetics i am loyal to: the genre of experimental art, DIY/Lo-fi stylings, and the creative underground.

i know that i was coaxed to make this nude art in the past to begin healing some raw personal trauma ... and i am coaxed to review this art now, because it reminds me that i did not question making it ~

* i got naked.
* i was brave. 
* and i endured harassing emails about said work, but kept the art public nonetheless. 

what about re-empowering all of this fierceness once again? 

what about going more deeply with my *divine masculine?* ... which to me means standing consistently in my confidence, not giving two hoots what anybody's gotta say about me, my work. ... what up, machete-yielding warriorrrr?!!

"uphill invisible swimming" ~ movement 4

"uphill invisible swimming" ~ movement 5

"uphill invisible swimming" ~ movement 5

"uphill invisible swimming" ~ movement 4

i've been experiencing a pretty transformational phase the last 2-4 months of my life. to expand upon this proclamation means admitting i've been generally overwhelmed, depressed, nervous in my belly, i've allowed my plate to be too full, but quite interestingly, my life also sparkles brilliantly. my near future is forming in a way i wholly adore. i have incredible friendships still and always. i live in Costa Rica. i am INSPIRED, and i KNOW that i'm aligning with my deeper purpose, my niche, my money-making.

2. let's remain on the topic of art for now. i've also been thinking *a lot* about a video from a favorite artist, BUNNY MICHAEL ~ SEE BELOW. i highly encourage you to watch the whole thing. her ideas in the beginning about being perceived through the lenses of egotism, narcissism, and delusion (by family, for example) have been coming up for me recently ... while there are brilliant reminders throughout this vid's entirety, the end also provides a gorgeous highlight ~ (skip thru if you must.) ... "dear artist, we need you. when you are living free, we feel like we can too." 

i needed to hear this ~ to be reminded that i am enough, to be reminded that in spite of coming from a place (with systems, conditioning) that does not readily understand or support artists, that keeps women down, i must keep forging the path for myself, for us. ... i have always known that i can do it, that i will make it in my own way, that my goals are worth pursuing ... and in living out these beliefs, believing that there is value in my expressions ... well, it doesn't mean that i am some gloating invaluable crazy person with too much self-interest.

3. so the moral of the story thus far? be fiercely true to you, to your unique vision. push boundaries if pushing boundaries pleases you. my art speaks to my own path/experience, but i also understand now its greater intention to uplift the divine feminine, to heal past generations of women, and to do so through a distinct kelly-lens that empowers my own sexuality, my own feminism, my own participation in the community of sisterhood. ... there is def a:

"Brooklyn-meets-jungle-priestess-but-i-was-
raised-on-a-farm-vibe" 

a lil 
"hiphop-sassy-stripper-girl-juju" 
sometimes 

... and i'm coming to realize i neither need nor hope anymore that my aesthetic will resonate with everyone ~ (this is my divine masculine at play!!) ... this is also a new understanding that allows me to thrive without tip-toeing around imagined (or real) concerns coming from thee outside (looking in.) 

... i will expand upon all this in a separate/focused article, but one more point i will make here is that i observe and experience the objectification of women ~ a huge topic. i've been challenged to consider recently that in expressing myself in a sexy style sometimes that i am coazing a dif convo about it all ... it's NOT about women being perceived as objects for men's viewing or fantasy or pleasure. for me, what is at play in my personal expressions, is self-love and reclamation, no matter how bootylicious a performance image or vid may be. 

in Eve Ensler's "Vagina Monologues," one particular story speaks to a woman wearing a short skirt, and that it doesn't mean (there are dozens of examples provided) that she is inviting cat calls or mistreatment of any variety by baring legs. ... i am creating a safe ART space to express myself as i please ~ as a sacred entity with depth, depth!! ... how does my creative message bring this depth to the forefront (or maybe sometimes just the periphery) whilst being real, sexy, tearful, vulnerable, human ... anything i need to be; i explore this all.

foto: Statia Grossman

foto: Statia Grossman

"uphill invisible swimming" ~ movement 6 (embellished)

SOME MISC. CLOSING TIDBITS: my dear spiritual mentor, Reverend Saundra Porter Thomas, reminds me, "building your empire takes a team. your queendom needs support." again, ask. don't beat yourself up for needing help. financial backing is brilliant, so is excellent mentorship ~ pursue it, and maintain open communications throughout.

* keep yourself "in the know" about grants, residences, and opportunities to submit your work. you deserve the next, next, and next levels of your business/artistry. keep putting yourself out there. 

"$elf-portz" #16 *roses rise, promise*

in closing, i've discovered also that there is nothing wrong with honoring my need to be alone a lot. with plenty of privacy and quietude, i feel the most balanced, the most safe, the most productive. when i do then decide to be a part of activities in the world, i am likely at my best. i notice an imbalance in myself when i've gone through brief "party girl" phases in my past, or when i try to have a "full calendar" vs. honoring the need to focus on myself.

Oshun Altar in Brooklyn by Marissa Arterberry

foto: Dawn Dawnalicious

xoxxo ~ kelly shaw willman